Sunday, March 4, 2012

Ugh

I was just reading my friend's blog post about February kicking her a$$. I can relate...too well.
I don't like to complain about being stressed, because we ALL have life issues that cause us concern. Many have it way worse than I do. But for my own sake I am going to blog about my personal stressors.

I am teaching a new class. It is kicking my a$$ into a whole new territory of stress. I am teaching Advanced Placement United States Government and Politics. Let me tell you what. This is NOT a class I would have taken in high school had it been offered, and I know I wouldn't have passed! Everyday at school I am pouring over about five or six different AP workbooks, the book, online sites, heck anything that can offer me help. I also teach another class, so that needs my attention. Then at night between the kids' stuff, I spend anywhere from 1-2 hours on it.

I DO NOT UNDERSTAND THIS CLASS! I'm sorry, but I have no clue (but I'm learning) about PACS, Super PACs, Election Laws, and okay I could write until the cows come home. So not only do I have to get it, but I have to present it in a way that the kids think I sort of get it. These kids are the best and the brightest in our school. It's no secret they are more intelligent than I am. Almost daily they ask me questions that I can't answer. The best part? I have a student teacher who seems to be able to answer the questions. They call him "prof." Yeah that's not a kick to the gut. I've been in tears more times over work since January than any other time in my job.

This is what I need to tell myself each day...:
I will get through this
I am healthy (okay except for the awesome 24 hours migraine I had for the first time in my life this weekend. I blame "the class.")
My family is healthy
My husband supports me and lets me work as needed
I am a better person because of this class
A professional challenge is good
So I have to give up a week of my summer vacation to learn more about this stuff this summer. So I can't apply for a history seminar. So what? I am so happy. (okay that's a lie)
And again one of my favorite mantras: What doesn't kill us makes us stronger.

Back I must go to work on my presentation about Interest Groups. Sounds thrilling huh?